INTJ Relationships, Love, & Compatibility
We have both stated sincerely that we “could” date each other, but for complex reasons I won't go into here it's unlikely we'll ever become romantically involved. Why are INTJs deemed to have high compatibility to ENFPs but low to INFPs? faster and more thoroughly than if you try to curate your various relationships. In my view, INTJs can enjoy satisfying relationships with any NP type, with ENTPs , INTPs, ENFPs, or INFPs. However, of these, the INTJ-INFP pairing seems to.
This is one reason why typology can be so useful for INTJs, as well as other types. One of the hallmarks of Fi is a desire to preserve and defend the uniqueness of the individual.9 Reasons Why INTJs Love ENFPs
Related to a strong concern for the individual is the Fi desire to aid the weak, helpless, and marginalized of society. This is why IFPs, for instance, can often be found helping the homeless, working with children with special needs, protecting endangered species, etc.
Once we add Fi into the mix, it is not hard to see how INTJs might be attracted, even if unconsciously, to rescuing and fixing those who seem needy or helpless. The relationship then becomes a sort of psychotherapeutic forum, with the INTJ working to analyze, diagnose, and treat his wounded partner.
INTJ Relationships, Love, & Compatibility
It zeroes in on the unique features of the individual and grows deeply attached to those qualities. While INTJs may not experience the consistent strength of feeling that FP types do, they are nonetheless influenced by the less conscious workings of Fi, which helps inspire loyalty, love, and commitment. This makes it a highly alluring function, powerful enough to inspire a fierce and protracted tug-of-war with the dominant function. Money also relates to status, another Se-related desire.
They may, for instance, feel forced to perform unfulfilling work that fails to utilize their Ni-Te gifts. Or, they may struggle when the quality of a product or accuracy of information is compromised for the sake of marketability. INTJs also hate having to act before their intuition has prompted them to do so. All of this can make the work life of INTJs rather miserable as they struggle to find a compromise between their Ni and Se concerns.
Even the idea of compromise can be loathsome to INTJs, since their idealism and perfectionism are so pronounced. This perfectionism tends to be most acute when they attempt to directly control Se outcomes, such as when making art, performing, or obsessing over money or status. When functioning healthily in Ni, however, they rarely fall into the obsessive grip of perfectionism.
With that said, pairing with an SFP rarely brings lasting satisfaction to INTJs, since, as introverts, their wholeness must come from the inside out, rather than vice-versa.
INTJs may also happen upon other NJs in their work settings, especially in scientific, academic, or tech-related fields. Overall, ENTJs may be somewhat preferable, bringing a degree of typological variety to the relationship. They can simply be themselves and feel comfortable employing their normal modes of communication.
And when this is combined with the natural power struggles of J pairings, such relationships may fail to get out of the starting gates.
The Pros and Cons of Dating Each Myers-Briggs Personality Type | Observer
There are a few reasons for this. I have known several ENFPs, for instance, who continue to associate with the religious tradition of their youth Sisubscribing to its tenets and even regularly attending services.
Behaviorally, however, they seem to live by their own rules, according to the whims and ways of their Ne. These sorts of dominant-inferior struggles can engender confusion with regard to what they want out of life and out of their relationships. Namely, do they want a more traditional lifestyle and relationship or a less conventional one? Their Ne-Fi combination relishes the opportunity to compare and experience diverse cultures.
Perhaps more importantly, as they go about their travels, there is a sense in which they hope to find themselves. They want to figure out who they are, what they value, what they should be doing, where they might want to live, as well as their preferred type of partner and relationship. This is due to the fact that their Introverted Feeling Fi function is in the auxiliary rather than dominant position in their functional stack.
ENFP Relationships, Love, & Compatibility
Hence, less mature ENFPs can often seem rather fickle or hypocritical. They may give lip service to certain Si values, while living in a way that seems to contradict those values.
This can of course be difficult for their prospective partners, who may feel confused about who the ENFP really is. In some cases, such confusion is justified, since the ENFP may herself be experiencing ambivalence with respect to her identity. We should be careful, however, not to prematurely fault or criticize young ENFPs for such discrepancies. After all, as extraverted Perceivers, their primary mode of operation is one of adaptation.
Understanding ENFPs in Relationships and How The ENFP Gets Along With Other Types | Truity
Moreover, developing a firm identity, especially early in life, should, at least in theory, be of greater concern for IP types, whose dominant function is one of inner Judging Fi or Ti. Concerns about finding a suitable career or relationship can also tend to push the identity issue for ENFPs, which may unfortunately hinder their natural course of type development. Ideally, ENFPs would exercise patience in young adulthood, allowing their Fi values to emerge over time.
With exposure to different cultures and ideas, they can gradually use and develop their Fi, clarifying their identity and preferred course in life. The last thing relationship-minded ENFPs need is to enter into marriage prematurely.